ROBOTS Review (Android)

Robots is a game based on the unity engine, borrowing elements from every other FPS shooter on android, since they're all basically exactly the same anyway.

You play as a guy who doesn't exist, trapped on a facility where you fight robots transported off an assembly line while trying to tickle you to death, and your only escape is to spend a metric shit-ton of money trying to unlock every door in the facility. the only objective is to last as long as you can until you can afford to unlock all the doors, in a facility so greedy, you'd think it was designed by a Jewish stereotype of a used car salesman.

GAMEPLAY:

If you didn't read the text blurb in the beginning when you start the game for the first time, you'd probably quit after the first five minutes like I did. All the rules of the game are in long boring full screen paragraphs like you're going to be quizzed on it later.

Basically it tells you that you have to pay for weapons and ammo while you play the game, and you can only unlock them during the game with money you earn while playing, so even if you're paying real cash for the weapons you buy, you basically have to re-buy the weapons in the game while you play, which is bullshit.

GRAPHICS:

This game has a nice flat-shaded sort of theme to it, either to borrow an aesthetic from the portal series, or to cover up the fact that the game doesn't have any bump mapping or textures on anything.

The thing I don't like about the graphics boils down to the on-screen controls, which can't be shank or stretched, and take up huge portions of the screen. When you go to set up your controls, you have to chose between seeing what the hell you're doing, or accidentally reloading or throwing a grenade or something because the controls are just too damn big.

VERDICT:

This gameplay, for the most part is good, but as I've said plenty of times before, "good" gameplay mechanics don't mean that much if you built your game using a Unity SDK and just tweaked it to your aesthetic. This game reeks of all the greedy money-grubbing tactics that have become the stereotype of the mobile gaming platform for years, which are, sadly, now bleeding into the current console generation.